Ignorant rednecks spew hate speech at Mexico, only stupid bigoted Americans can do that sort of thing, right Mr. Clarkson? Ahem, I said isn’t that right Mr. Clarkson? Thank goodness we have the BBC in America now to protect us from this sort of bile.
Jeremy Clarkson’s (who?) newest crusade isn’t against ugly women in shop’s or American’s, it is against board games like Monopoly, Risk or Scrabble. Apparently having met the bottom of the barrel for topics he has decided to keep digging. You have to admire his determination.
Like most homes we have several minor spirits we venerate. The most famous of them is Sockulus, the sock god. He shows his anger when you do not venerate him enough by taking away one sock in a pair. I have a small temple of solo socks near where I do the laundry and sometimes he is pleased by this and returns a wandering sock.
My wife just asked me for a philips head screwdriver. This made me laugh as our house is under a dire curse from Slotulus, the philips head spirit and we can keep no philips heads in our house. I used to have a full tool kit, with a good selection of philips heads. They are all gone now. Over the years I have twice bought sets of just philips head screwdrivers. They are all gone now as well. I am not sure how to appease Slotulus, but this is a tough curse to live under. Tonight when the moon is high I am going to cut the heart from a regular head screw driver in the yard and see if I can placate Slotulus, but until I do I will just laugh when my wife asks if we have any philips heads.
I know now that I am a bad bad man. Curses to Radley Balko for pointing out this video, Can Yakety Sax make anything funny? I laughed.
I am horrible, I watched it again and still laughed. What has Benny Hill done to my soul!